Top three things to do when you’re dead

Nothing unites all creatures quite like the fact that one day, we will all die.  When i was 4, i was so fixated on what happened when we died that i cornered my Mother and insisted she tell me what was the outcome of death.  Many years later,  my Daughter asked me the same thing just as it was my turn at the bank teller.  Humans are unique in that we all know that some day we will shed this mortal coil.

Each year about 247,000 + people die in Canada.  In general, it works out to about .7 % of our population.  The majority of these people choose burial.  At a cost of $3000 to $15,000 +  for burial vs. $700 + for cremation, families strapped for cash and with no religious opposition may find cremation more appealing… at least until mummification or taxidermy is legal.  Another plus for cremation is that embalming is not always required prior to cremation.  The chemicals used in embalming are rather nasty.  Let’s face it, if you could be planted under a young apple tree without chemicals,  those apples would be effin delicious but the reality is your corpse is gonna be a chemical waste-land taking up space in a festering expensive box.

So anyway… today’s top three is dedicated to what to have done with your cremated remains:

1)   A standard urn,  a thing of horror for the great grand-kids may be fun for you to choose.  Then you run the risk of your remains being knocked off the mantle and inhaled by the family dog… or perhaps by these guys.

Some urns hold all the bodily cremains while others hold a small portion.  I rather dig these little ghosties below.

2)  Opt for something retro…  you may even trick someone into bringing you to school in their lunch by mistake.

3)  Go for the geekery or humor.

Cookie jars as a choice would definitely require a zip-lock bag inside to be sure people don’t put cigarettes out in you.

Each day, we are closer to death so we have no excuses not to be prepared.  You can have your cremains made into precious stones, bullets or simply dumped on your neighbor’s lawn.  If all else fails, donate your body to science… those doctors all have to practice on *something*.


Top three ways to be a better member of society.

Even the most rebellious of us cannot deny, we are human and human creatures tend to live in packs.  Here are today’s top three ways to be a better member of society.

1) Pay your taxes.  Pay your taxes willingly and with pride.  It is patriotic to pay taxes and it supports so many wonderful things.  Paying taxes does NOT mean your government is out to get you nor does it mean that you are living in a socialist state.  Look at it this way… if you live in a house, someone has to cover the mortgage or rent, the food, the electricity, repairs etc.  Living in a society is no different.  If you do not pay into your society, you cannot gripe about how your Country turns out.  Here is an example of what happens when no one wants to pay taxes.  If you take issue with what your government does with those taxes, form a committee.  Get involved in politics.  If you are a large corporation or a wealthy individual, even more patriotic of you to step up and do the right thing.  You guys make your money off of the people in your society don’t you?  Be sure to pay it forward.  If your Country owes a crapload, it didn’t happen in the last two years, so stop blaming the current elected official and look at the history of your debt.

2) Stop watching Fox News.  Seriously.  Stop getting your “facts” from any media source that leans right or left.  I remember way back when i was taking grade 11 Journalism classes our teacher taught us the first rule of journalism is that you REPORT THE FACTS.  You are never to skew the facts to fit your opinion unless writing an editorial.  Far too many media sources in North America are merely a voice for specific political agenda.  Left or Right, getting the facts and not the rhetoric will help you make better electoral decisions.  While virtually every form of media has an undercurrent of opinion, ferreting out the closest thing to the truth while not easy, is responsible.

3) Vote.  Even if you think your options are a farce, you cannot hope to make a difference in any way if you don’t vote.  Voting is something that people in many countries have died for the right to do.  Overlook if you can the vilification of politicians by other parties and read as much as you can about the party, the person, the politics.  However you vote, voting is one of the most respectable things you can do as a member of your society… it shows you care.